I had a terrible morning. I’m pretty confused, upset, angry, sad, a mixed bag of emotions. No matter how hard I try to keep my shit together, the tears won’t stop.
I lost a very good friend this morning. He took his own life. He was only 35 years old. He left two small children behind.
Times are tough for a lot of people right now. I cannot imagine getting to the emotional state of distress my friend was in. I cannot imagine what the mother of his children will tell them. I saw the grief his family was going through at the hospital. Taking your own life leaves a train wreck behind for your family. I don’t understand, I really don’t understand how someone so full of life can do this. I’m trying to understand.
Seared in my memory now is the image of him as I watched the EMS crew take him out of his house. I want to remember him as I knew him, a happy go-lucky guy that was everyone’s friend.
My prayers to his family.
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I am so sorry for your loss. There are situtions where mere word cannot work. That’s what tears are for……
Sorry, should read “words”….
Dan, I’m sorry. I don’t even know the young man and I have tears in my eyes.
So sorry, Dan. Joining you in prayers for the family.
So sorry for your loss and the family’s loss. I am sending prayers your way.
Dan,
The evil one is delighted that your friend took the easy way off this troubled orb. The best thing that you can do now, as a friend, is help with those two kids. The likelihood that they will grow up as Godhaters just went up quite a bit.
Times are tough and getting tougher. We must draw near to the Source of our Life. He is There and is not Silent. This is no time to be lukewarm. Time to become freaks for Jesus. No one else can save our wretched arses.
If I just offended someone … get over it. Choose this day whom you will serve. There is too much on the line to not talk about the Ultimate issue. (Over beer, no need to be more pious that Jesus or Paul.)
I pray for your friend\’s soul. May he find rest and his act inspire no one else.
And may the rest of us man up for Jesus \’cause the merde is hitting the fan.
Sorry for your loss, Dan.
I\’m not sure that understanding will make the loss any easier to bear. I\’ve been told that those who take their own life most generally do so not because circumstances become unbearable, but because they become convinced that those circumstances cannot be changed. The reaction is not to too much pain, but to too little hope.
The insanity in this thinking is that things do, inevitably, change.
Thank you for all your kind comments.
I guess if I have anything to say, it would be to pray for his little girls.
I believe you are right about a train wreck. So aptly put.
This is so tragic, not only because of loss of life, but because of the number of people so deeply affected in more ways that can be counted.
From the person who you see at the gas station every week.. to the friends of friends who know you.. to the people who watched you grow up.. you are never here alone.
I would be to point out to every single person that they are not existing alone in this world, no matter what depths of despair they may be looking towards.
Not only is life precious, but every action we take causes another reaction.
Go call your family just to say you love them. Smile at the check-out person.
Thank God for your life.
Danny –
I am so sorry. The holiday season becomes so difficult for so many and so easy for despair to set in. I hate what this his done to his precious family, he will feel no more pain and despair, but look at what he has left behind. This is a time when you have to believe in God the most and believe that our God is a just God and he weighs the life of each and every soul, not by one desperate act, but by the life as a whole…and yes this is where I have conflict with the Catholic faith.
Danny I know and love you as a person and I know the pain and despair you feel over this, reach out to your own family and to his family and let your love for these people fill their lives. This is where you will find healing.
My prayers are with you and the Family.
Condolences on the loss of your friend.
Dan,
I’d like to echo what others have said – I am sorry for your loss.
While in college, I had the opportunity to work with some folks who were ‘depressed’ and had other mental illnesses.
It was an eye-opener for me. People who are in that state of mind don’t understand that train wreck that they’ll leave behind. They are so consumed by the darkness and sadness that they just want an escape button.
Of course I absolutely do not condone taking the escape button route, but before I had this opportunity (to work with these folks), I always thought that the people who followed through were selfish/self-centered. Now, I understand differently. These lost souls really don’t have the capacity to be selfish. They’re so closed down and numb.
I will pray that his two daughters get through their pain and that they grow up to have beautiful lives.